What is a Calamity Cookie?

A Calamity Cookie is a fortune cookie with a less-than-fortunate fortune inside. They can be given as a gift or, if you’re a little sadistic, you can get them for yourself. The fortunes are sure to amuse or upset the recipient, making them a great gift for a friend or friendly rival. Get them for that person in your life who you wish would be a little less lucky or who you just want to knock down a peg or two.


Our Cookie Packs

Calamity Cookies 5 Pack

Our original product. Contains six cookies with unique fortunes.

Who deserves a Calamity Cookie?


Occasional Dick

We all know a person who is an occasional dick, but we still like them. Or we don't. It doesn't really matter, this gift goes well for both.


It's very likely that most of your family doesn't have that promising of a future anyway, so here's a way to remind them.

Literally Everyone

Whether they're a friend or a foe, a loved one or not, everyone will either get a good laugh or really offended when they get one of our cookies.